Feeling Like a Fraud: Understanding and Coping with Imposter Syndrome in Nursing

La Jolla Shores, San Diego, CA

Hafa adai friends! Another departure from my travel nurse blogs, but I’m sure I can tie this into my travel nurse journey somehow. Lately, I’ve been listening to Ali Abdaal’s podcast “Deep Dive” and some of the topics he talks about with the people he interviews are absolutely amazing. I can’t quite pinpoint which podcast, or if it even was a podcast or a YouTube video that he made that discussed the idea of imposter syndrome.

Ali Abdaal was a doctor in the UK who is now a full-time content creator with a successful YouTube channel, SkillShare class, and podcast. He’s talked about his struggles with imposter syndrome as a doctor and as a content creator. Seeing someone as successful as Ali talk about and go through imposter syndrome helped me to realize how prevalent the syndrome is, especially in people that we assume to have it all and are hugely successful.

I can confidently say that I have experienced imposter syndrome throughout my career as a nurse! I started in the ICU fresh out of nursing school. I barely had the basic foundations of nursing down when I started training and working in the ICU. I learned very quickly that the ICU has a massive learning curve, especially for a new graduate nurse. No matter how much I learned, I still felt like I didn’t know enough. On top of that, having the title of an ICU nurse felt like it came with this expectation that I should know nearly anything and everything! The truth was, I didn’t know everything. When I thought I knew something well enough, I was faced with something new to learn about that very thing.

Despite what I learned every day, I still felt like a fraud. I attributed my successes as an ICU nurse to luck and I completely overlooked the progress that I made in my own skills and abilities. I went as far as minimizing my own achievements and downplaying my own accomplishments. Unfortunately, this constant pursuit of self-improvement and growth in order to fit into the role of an ICU nurse quickly led to me burning out.

A 2021 study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology found that imposter syndrome can lead to burnout and negative outcomes for individuals in the workplace. The study also highlighted that imposter syndrome can be linked to workaholism and perfectionism, leading to a cycle of overwork and dissatisfaction. I found this to be true as I sought to pick up extra shifts in the hopes of learning more and perfecting my skills and craft as an ICU nurse. I thought of this as making up for my lack of experience in the ICU and as a nurse overall.

Despite my pursuit of perfectionism, I always found myself finding something to critique about myself. Some days I would go home thinking constantly about the IV tubing that I didn’t label, the documentation that I missed, or the little piece of the report that I forgot to tell the nurse that took over. Ultimately, I had to learn to come to terms with my imposter syndrome, and here’s how I started.

Recognize the Feeling

The first step in overcoming imposter syndrome is to recognize that you are experiencing it. Accepting that the feeling exists is the first step in addressing it. The first time that I recognized this was about 6 months after starting work in the ICU. I texted my mentor and told him about my struggles and concerns about my imposter syndrome. To my surprise, he told me that he also felt the same way when he first started (mind you, he also started in the ICU as a new grad nurse). Opening up about my imposter syndrome ties into the next tip.

Talk to Someone

Sharing your feelings with a close friend, family member, or therapist can help you gain perspective and support. It can also help you recognize that imposter syndrome is a common experience and understanding that can help you not feel so alone. Once I opened up to my mentor, it helped me to open up to my partner and let her know how I felt.

Challenge Negative Self-Talk

Imposter syndrome often involves negative self-talk that reinforces feelings of inadequacy. I definitely had a lot of negative self-talk early on that kept me feeling like I could never truly be a good ICU nurse. You can challenge these thoughts by reframing them in a positive way. Instead of saying, “I’m not qualified for this job,” say, “I’ve earned this job through my hard work and dedication.”

Celebrate Your Accomplishments

Take time to reflect on your achievements and recognize your hard work. Keep a journal of your successes and revisit it when you’re feeling self-doubt. I personally didn’t start journaling until this year, but seeing pictures of my friends and coworkers celebrating my achievements, such as getting my CCRN, has helped me to realize just how far I have come and how much I’ve learned.

Practice Self-Compassion

Imposter syndrome often involves being hard on yourself. Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with kindness and understanding. Remember that it’s okay to make mistakes and that everyone has flaws. That one IV tubing I forgot to label can be replaced. That one education documentation that you forgot? Dozens of other nurses have forgotten it every now and then. That little piece of the story about your patient that you forgot to mention in the report? The nurse that took over will learn about it eventually.

Nursing happens 24/7 and that’s why there’s another nurse to take over. I’ve gone from saying “Damn, I forgot to chart so and so.” to saying to the nurse that I’m relieving “Don’t worry, I’ll get it done.” The kindness, patience, and compassion that I show to other nurses are characteristics that I have learned to show myself.

A quote from Vinland Saga, one of my favorite anime/manga right now, goes:

“I want to be a kinder, gentler person. I want to be a stronger person.”

The kindness and gentler approach to myself has shown me how much stronger of a person and nurse I have become and I’m always striving to be the same for others. Remember to be kind to yourself. Be gentle with yourself.

Until next time! Salamat and si yu’us ma’ase!

Reference:

Cordes, C. L., & Dougherty, T. W. (2021). A review and integration of research on imposter syndrome and its impact on work-related outcomes. Journal of Applied Psychology, 106(3), 365-390. doi: 10.1037/apl0000921